Dark Side of the Moon

Listening to the soft strumming of a Spotify playlist, golden sunlight streams in through the windows to my left. The billowing steam rises from the depths of our radiators and out into a cloud that dances its shadow across the buildings to the West. It’s the first Wednesday of the year. Hump day. The point which marks the downhill coast towards the weekend. This week has been an interesting transition into 2021. I guess I expected no less. Among other things, my Grandma and Uncle were hospitalized with Covid complications in California. My Grandma is now home and my uncle should be released today, all good news, but very unsettling to be so far away when things like that happen. I feel that processing 2020 while not being in it, trudging along trying to stay positive, is completely different. Getting to look at it in the rear view mirror offers a different perspective. Since I graduated college in 2013, my life has been transition after transition. I haven’t stayed in one place with one job for longer than about a year and a half. I’ve lived in Chico, Long Beach, Brazil, New Jersey and New York. I’ve shifted careers twice, this last time forced by a furlough. Every year I’ve looked back at the mountain of changes and found it notable. This year, the difference is that everyone feels that way. Moving forward I want to focus on foundation. I want to give myself the opportunity to create and grow and have it build on itself. All the moving pieces have the potential to settle here in NY and grow roots and I am so excited about that. May this year be whatever you need it to be.

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Ao ouvir o dedilhar suave de uma lista de reprodução do Spotify, raios dourados de sol entram pelas janelas à minha esquerda. O vapor ondulante sobe das profundezas de nossos radiadores e sai em uma nuvem que dança sua sombra através dos edifícios a oeste. É a primeira quarta-feira do ano. Hump ​​day. O ponto que marca a descida da costa no fim de semana. Esta semana foi uma transição interessante para 2021. Acho que não esperava menos. Entre outras coisas, minha avó e meu tio foram hospitalizados com complicações de Covid, na Califórnia. Minha avó está em casa e meu tio deve ser liberado hoje, todas boas notícias, mas muito perturbador estar tão longe quando coisas assim acontecem. Eu sinto que processar 2020 sem estar nele, andar com dificuldade tentando ficar positivo, é completamente diferente. Olhar para ele pelo espelho retrovisor oferece uma perspectiva diferente. Desde que me formei na faculdade em 2013, minha vida tem sido uma transição após uma transição. Não fico em um lugar com trabalho há mais de um ano e meio. Morei em Chico, Long Beach, Brasil, New Jersey e New York. Mudei de carreira duas vezes, desta vez forçado por uma licença. Todos os anos, eu olhava para trás, para a montanha da mudança, e a achava notável. Este ano, a diferença é que todos se sentem assim. Seguindo em frente, quero me concentrar na fundação. Eu quero me dar a oportunidade de criar e crescer e fazer com que seja construído por si mesmo. Todas as partes móveis têm potencial para se estabelecer aqui em NY e criar raízes e estou muito animado com isso. Que este ano seja o que você precisa que seja.

beijos

Birthday Back Home

Photos by Jenelle Zavala

Dress - Thrifted (and tailored by my Mamma moments before this little shoot <3)

As you may have seen on my Instagram, I went home to Chico, CA for my birthday last week. I was unsure what I wanted to do this year for my birthday but this last-minute decision worked out beautifully! Last year I was tucked into the Montana mountains. It was the perfect place to reflect on the year I had just had and the year ahead of me. I didn't want this year to be anything less and thanks to my beautiful Mamma and lovely friends it was a perfect day. I kind of feel like I was 27 for multiple years, even though it flew by in other ways. Birthdays are opportunities to check in. They're mile markers ... Are you where you thought you'd be? Do you want to do more? Less? Create a new path even if it requires hacking your way through with a machete? Haha 

cheers to new years 

Mariamma

Home Body

Black Silk Maxi Slip - A gift from my Mamma

Happy Saturday! I got off of work not too long ago and am currently brainstorming on what to do with the rest of the afternoon. It's a bit chilly today so cozy things are sounding best. This evening I am going to my friend Dani's modern dance performance in Pasadena and then going out dancing with some friends in Hollywood. Should be a festive little night on the town! My friends Sabrina and Meg who I'm going out with tonight are moving to the Caribbean in about ten days, so I'm soaking up as much of them as possible before their impending departure. They have lived a few blocks away from me since I moved to Long Beach and I am so sad to lose such awesome neighbors! I'm obviously very excited for them though and have been playing with the idea of going to visit. I hope you're all having a lovely weekend! 

xoxo 

Mariamma